Evie's Memorial Service...a letter

It's been almost a year since I have written on our family blog. I haven't decided whether or not I will begin posting again regularly, but I wanted to post the letter we wrote for Evie's memorial service on our blog to share with those of you who weren't able to be with us that day.   It's our privilege to share what little we know of her with you through this letter.  I hope you will get a glimpse of our deep love for our girl and how grieved we were to lose her, as well as see the great hope we have because of Christ.  Our hope has proven to be a trustworthy anchor to our souls in the midst of this storm.  As my dear pastor says, "grief is great but grace is greater." Finding this to be true in each moment.

Dear Family and Friends,

                We are grateful to have each of you with us today.   Your presence with us today as well as this past week have been a source of great comfort and even joy as we have grieved the loss of our sweet Evie girl.  God has used you all to show his tender heart to us and we are so grateful.  Thank you so much for all your calls, cards, gifts, texts, flowers, meals, visits, help with our children, and your prayers.  We have truly felt “carried” by you all during this time and it’s because of your presence and your prayers. 

                                            

Last Tuesday, Nov 3^rd is the day we learned of Evie’s death.  Our hearts have been so very grieved as we have begun to adjust to the reality that we will live out our days on this earth without her.  Our moments of having her in my womb and our short moments holding her Tuesday evening leave us with a deep hole in our hearts and a longing for more time with her. We so long to snuggle her, to see if her hair really was red and curly, to laugh at her antics, to discipline her, to watch her love her brothers and sister and to become a Huffman, with all our quirks and family jokes. 

The reality that those expectations will never happen leaves us deeply sad but not without hope.    On the morning of Nov 3^rd, as we headed to the hospital, God reminded Andy and I separately of Psalm 139…”All the days of my life were written in your book before any of them came to be.” Though we had expectations of a life here with Evie, God knew the number of her days.  And he knew that the day we learned of her death would also be the day we learned of her birthday in heaven. 

And it’s her birthday in heaven that gives us great cause for joy and hope.  Our deepest longing for each of our children is that they would love and trust Jesus and live with him for eternity.  On Nov 3^rd we were given a precious gift….the  knowledge that our Evie has begun her eternal life with Jesus and that she is safe in heaven cheering us on as we sojourn on this earth.  She knows the joy of seeing her Savior face to face.  She is able to fully enjoy Jesus and his people without her sin nature in the way.  She knows joy beyond what we can imagine.  And one day, we too will see our Savior face to face alongside her.   Though it feels far to us now, we know that soon we will be with her, enjoying our Savior with her and getting to know her in deeper and fuller ways than we ever could have on this earth. 

As we laid her little body to rest this week, God reminded me that she is such a gift to us.  Not only a daughter, but now our sister in Christ. He gave us a new person along with the promise of getting to enjoy her for all of eternity.  Though we know so little of her now, we are truly those proud parents who are excited to share her with you.  

When we found out we were pregnant, we were both quite surprised.  Because of fairly serious complications after Judah’s birth, we had decided it would not be wise to have any more biological children.  Deep down I longed to have another child.  Though I was fearful of further complications, I was also excited.   From the beginning of my pregnancy, God gave me such a deep peace about my own health as well as our baby’s health.  Her life felt like such an unexpected gift and God gave me so much grace to trust him with the uncertainty of my own health issues.  That surrender and peace has continued to be there as we have grieved her this week. 

As we began to adjust to the idea of a fourth child, our hearts grew excited to get to know her.  Just as our other children are such treasures and getting to know them has been such a source of joy for us, we knew getting to know her would be as well. 

We named Evie after my two grandmothers.  My paternal grandmother Eva is incredibly gentle and loving.  She and I spent many Sunday afternoons together in her swing enjoying the shade of her giant magnolia tree.  She loves begonias, NC state football, and made sweet potatoes, beets and cabbage and slightly sweet tea for many of our special Sunday lunches.  She is close to her homecoming in heaven and I love to think of our Evie helping Jesus welcome her home.

My maternal grandmother Christine is strong and loving.  She has called me Lucy for most of my life.  My brother and I spent many nights with them and I have happy memories of her back scratches, popcorn before bed, and learning to drink black coffee at her house.  Her house and her love were a source of refuge for me during several difficult seasons in my life. 

Andy and I have been well loved by these women and we were excited to name our girl in their honor.  Andy came up with the idea of calling her Evie.  I loved her name from the beginning but I love it even more now.  He pointed out to me after Evie’s death that her first name Eva, points to her humanity…being made in the image of Adam and Eve and that her middle name Christine points to her unity with Christ….now being made in the image of Christ.  Her name is a summary of 1 Corinthians 15:49

Just as we have borne the image of the man of dust, we shall also bear the image of the man of heaven.  As Evie bore the image of the man of dust, so will she forever bear the image of her Savior, Jesus Christ.

Our children were also excited for a baby sister.  Evie received many kisses and “leg hugs” from Judah while in my belly.  He truly loves her.  Emma Grace and Jack were also eagerly waiting to meet her.  They asked if they too could share some stories about Evie with you.   Emma Grace wrote “My sister had a short life but I had some memories of her.  These are some of my memories.  The first time I felt her kick I felt happy.  Here’s another memory:  I loved seeing the ultrasound pictures of her.”   Jack wrote, “I would like to tell you some stories about Evie and I will start with this one.  She had red hair and had chunky cheeks. She even had a small body.” 

Along with these memories we also enjoyed excitedly sorting her clothes, dressing up my belly for Halloween, Huffman hugs with my belly in the middle and singing Jesus loves Evie girl.  Her time in my belly was undoubtedly filled with the noise of our voices! 

Our favorite family memory of her in my belly was the morning I woke them up with a big smiley face drawn on my belly and said “Evie says HI!!”  We all laughed heartily.  Then the kids proceeded to draw faces on their bellies as well.  For about a week I would catch Judah coloring his belly with markers! 

Those few memories are gifts to us and leave our hearts longing for more of her.  Evie was a surprise gift to our family…. A gift we just have to wait until heaven to fully unwrap. 

We gave my grandmother balloons when we told her we were naming her Eva and we also released pink balloons when we told our family she was a girl.  I chose balloons for the service today because we can truly celebrate today.  Yes we grieve, but we also celebrate.  We celebrate the life God knit together in my womb.  We celebrate curly red headed Evie Huffman, an eternal soul who is our daughter and also forever our sister in Christ.  We celebrate that our Savior tasted death for us so that Evie, like us, can live forever. 

As we grieve and celebrate today, I pray these words from 1 Thessalonians will encourage your hearts, as they have ours: 

13Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope. 14For we believe that Jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him. 15According to the Lord’s word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep. 16For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. 17After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever. 18Therefore encourage one another with these words.

Here's one of the songs we used for her service.   

NEW BEDS

After all the presents were opened, we sent the kids upstairs to put their new comforters on their beds!  They were very surprised to see new beds in their rooms!!  So fun to surprise little ones!  

 She's thrilled about her princess bed.  (And so am I...much more comfortable to have a double bed to read to her or snuggle with her! )

 And the boys...equal amounts of jumping commenced when they saw their bunk bed.  We've all been dreaming of this for a while!

 He slept in his Ninja Turtle gear the first night!

Judah, our dear third child, has spent many many night in bed with us.  Thankfully he's mostly sleeping in his own bed these days.  But he still loves when Mommy and Daddy snuggle him to sleep.  Something I never did with my other two....but sooo wish I would have!  Happy snuggling to us!

Two going on five

On most two year old's Chirstmas wishlist:  legos, a scooter, and a soccer ball. 

 On Judah's:  A barstool.

Yep,  A barstool!  When you have older siblings and you think you are five rather than three, it seems cruel not to have your own little spot at the bar!  A barstool means eating at the bar which means no more high chair!  He'd thrilled...and we are bracing ourselves!

He's Happy

This man is happy...he's wanted a swing for a while and the kids got him one for Christmas.  Think there will be many lazy Sunday afternoons putting this to good use!

The Good Gift from the Good Father

6:30 am. Pour the cereal. Give a hard-to-wake child a gentle foot massage to start the morning.  Shout hooray out the back door for a wild boy running touch downs.  Strip the sheets, just like yesterday and the day before. Start the wash. Change a diaper. Help the sleepy child get dressed.  Warm leftover beans and rice for lunch.  Correct the spelling on his last minute homework.  Brush tangled hair. Pour cinnamon in the oatmeal. Scramble to find all the folders and misplaced homework.  Tie the shoes. Read a Bible story. Peel an orange.  Referee an argument over the small football.  Make sure curious little ones stay in the driveway as the trash truck arrives.  Speak soothing words over the anxious child, nervous about school.  Look into their eyes and pray a blessing over these little people fast becoming big people. Kisses. Out the door.

Light a candle.  Find my favorite blanket.  Ask the Lord to show me his heart of love for me.  I am empty, days spent far from him.  My heart has begun to doubt his Father's heart, which often happens when I stray away from his word, from trust, from love, from him. I read these words:

 Now suppose one of you fathers is asked by his son for a fish; he will not give him a snake instead of a fish, will he?  Or if he is asked for an egg, he will not give him a scorpion, will he?  If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him?” Luke 11:11-13

It's true.  I am evil, a chief of sinners, my heart proving it over and over.  Yet somehow I know how to give good gifts to my children.  This morning I gave them food, attention, help, guidance, prayers, cinnamon and a loud hooray, good gifts to meet their needs.

 How much more will my Father in Heaven, who is NOT EVIL, but good, and perfect, kind, and generous, give me a good gift, yes,  the Holy Spirit.  As I meditated on why the Holy Spirit is the good gift Jesus mentions here, I thought of two scriptures:  

And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love Romans 5:5

Because you are his sons, God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, the Spirit who calls out, "Abba, Father." Galatians 4:6

The good gift is the Spirit who sheds the Father's love in our hearts, connects us to the Father, teaches us to call him Daddy. In giving the Spirit he is giving us himself.  And this is the gift our souls need the most: CONNECTION WITH GOD

If I who am evil can give provision and protection, cinnamon, and discipline,  how much more will  he who is kind and generous graciously give me Holy Spirit, yes give me himself!    

I blow out my candle.  Take my last sip of tea, now cold from these moments of quiet and head into the day. I've got a God who gives good gifts, yes, the best gift.  I am strengthened once again to graciously dole out good gifts to my people.  

No. Well, sort of....

A friend asked me recently if I had any new year's resolutions.  It was easy for me to answer her as I had already been thinking about the subject.  The answer: No.  Well...sort of.

I have had a wonderful year of naming gifts each day(my 2014 resolution) , but this year when I think about making some sort of resolution or goal I immediately feel tired.  I am pretty sure I have never fully kept a resolution in all my life and on top of that I have areas in my life where I am already wanting to grow, needing and trying to grow.  But to add a plan or to pile something new on just makes me weary.

More than that, I know myself:  it's not the resolution itself in these areas that can change me.    A person can change me, but a plan, nope.

I had already decided that my new year's resolution would simply be to depend more.  Instead of mapping out a new eating plan or an exercise routine, or charting a course for self recovery in my pride, and materialism, I am just gonna depend.  I am going to draw close to the one who can change me and will change me in his timing.  Right now, that's all I've got and the good news is, that's all he wants from me anyway.

The reason a plan won't change me?  My sin patterns and bad behaviors have deep roots. A plan focuses on my behavior, but I need someone who can transform my heart...the root of all of my bad behaviors.   I need a person, yes Jesus, who knows the depths of my heart, to show me what I am loving in place of him, to teach me to drink from his well instead of the broken cisterns I choose each day.  And this Jesus is so capable.

As I have mulled over this idea the past few days it's been really freeing.  Are you tired like me?  Are you at the end of yourself and know beyond a shadow of a doubt that a new plan ain't gonna cut it?  I don't have anything in me to muster up...which is right where my Savior wants me...so instead I will draw close to him, crying "Lord have mercy on me, a sinner" each and every day, and watch what he does.

Instead of being better, I want to be closer.

Instead of walking in my strength, I will walk in dependence on him.

Instead of a call to behave, I will heed the call to behold.

In place of a plan, I will put prayer.


For 2015,that's all I've got folks.  Thankfully, it's more than enough.

GRATITUDE 243 Mountaineer Time!!

Jack and Andy share a love for football (esp the Mountaineers), so many Saturday afternoons are often spent watching games! And Judah is growing to love the Mountaineers as well!  Thankful for the sense of belonging that comes with being a part of a family.  Thankful for common interests and loves.  Thankful for Daddy time!

GRATITUDE 242 Christmas Performance-Judah Style

So grateful for this little class and for the kind teachers!  Judah's Christmas performance was cute...I would have posted a video, but Judah didn't sing the whole time.  Instead he picked his nose and cried...so not to much to see!  HEHE.  But it was delightful.  He loves school and I am grateful for the way these sweet ladies point our kiddos to the gospel.  They are reading through the Jesus storybook Bible, which is one of our favorites.  Our kids are soooo blessed to hear the gospel from such a young age.  God is so kind to our little family!

GRATITUDE 241 Sunday evening baseball

Thankful:

For our Cul de sac
For shorts weather in December
For all the fun people we live near
For cul de sac baseball
For God's kind and lavish provision of our home, neighbors, and friends for our kids.  Kindness.

GRATITUDE 240 An Early Christmas

We had an early Christmas with my parents and it was delightful.  So grateful for these two, for their love and generosity and the really fun time we had this weekend!  

MY. PARENTS. ARE. AWESOME.  

EG made earrings for my mom, who was a very good sport and wore them (they were made with paper clips!!!)

GRATITUDE 239 They're off!

My kids have the best grandparents...the best.  So thankful for the way these two love my kids!

They're off to Legoland for Jack's 6th birthday.

GRATITUDE 238 This season

So thankful for this Advent season...we've had a great time working our way through the Jesse Tree and reading the grand story of God breaking into lives with incredible promises, radical grace, and an incredible plan to rescue his people in the face of their sin and brokenness.  As I have prepared my heart for his coming at Christmas, my mind and heart have been drawn to his second Advent.  Oh come quickly Lord Jesus!

Here are a few things I am thankful for in this season:

chocolate kisses each night with our reading....what delight they bring to my kiddos
Promises of peace with God, peace with each other, and peace in the deepest recesses of my soul!
That my God is wild with mercy, radical with grace, fiercely committed to glorifying his name by rescuing his people
A few cold days where we even had to turn on our little space heaters
Fall colors...yep fall is finally here in Florida
Christmas lights, hot chocolate and friends...a great night!

GRATITUDE 237 Happy Birthday dear Jack!

Tender and kind,
Strong and brave.
Fun and silly.

A gift to this mama indeed.   Happy birthday Jack.  I've said it many times...I am so grateful that I get to be your mama!

GRATITUDE 236 The whisper of the better tree

Satan is the Father of Lies and he's been spinning the same story since the beginning. If you stop and think about the root beliefs behind each choice to sin, you'll here his voice, you'll recognize his lies. Yes, Eve heard his lies loud and clear and she bit into the over-promising and under-delivering fruit of the first tree. We too so often sit under the shadow of that tree,  looking to what the world can offer us, and we don't even know we are listening to his lies.  See if you recognize his voice next time you are heading to pick the fruit yourself. It sounds something like this:

God will withhold from you

He doesn't really want you to have everything your heart really desires

He's not really trustworthy so go ahead, and take care of yourself.

He doesn't really love you

Don't trust him.

But at the better tree, the cross, God whispers the truth to your doubting heart:

I will not withhold anything from you, not even my son. How will I not along with him graciously give you all things?

Through this tree, I give you access back into my presence...where there is fullness of joy and pleasures forevermore. Yes, everything your heart could ever want....it's here with me.

And through this tree, you'll get my spirit too, which will constantly be pushing you to call me Daddy, yes, encouraging you back into loving dependence on me, your good Father.

Yes, at this better tree, in the face of your sin, I give you my son, I give you my spirit, I give you access back to me, your Father. I love you. I always have. I always will.

You don't have to take care of yourself....I love you. I will take care of you. Trust me.

I want to sit under the shadow of the better tree and let God whisper his words of love to my mistrusting heart. Yes, he loves me! Yes, I can trust him. The fruit of the tree, as much as it promises satisfaction and beauty offers nothing compared to the eternal joy and pleasures of being known by God and knowing him.

Let's find time to sit under the better tree and allow it's shadow of love to renew our minds to see him as he is: OUR GOOD HEAVENLY DADDY.   

GRATITUDE 235 Advent Traditions!

Christmas Season is Underway and I am thankful for a time to reflect on our Savior's coming.

Thankful for our Advent Traditions.

Thankful for my cute kids in Christmas pajamas

A fun "night before Advent" hot chocolate party with neighbors

Thankful that Christ has come into my life...that he is coming into all the broken sinful parts and is making me new!  

234 Thankful for Thanksgiving

What a fun day we had with our dear friends celebrating Thanksgiving!  So thankful for this day, these people, and a chance to give thanks in a BIG celebration kind of way!  

GRATITUDE 233 A year of Thanksgiving...My Reflections

I'm up early this morning to boil eggs, mash sweet potatoes, and make sure my turkey is happily brine-ing away.  My heart has been excited for this day all week.  Excited to celebrate with a few folks who are more like family than friends.  Excited to watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade with my kids, to break out the karaoke machine (YEP!), and excited to eat one of our favorite spreads of the year.

But more than those fun things, my heart has been excited for this day because it feels like an apex to my year of gratitude.  Rather than a day that jolts me out of my INGRATITUDE and startles me with the call to THANKSGIVING,  this day feels like I've reached a climax of sorts.  For a long time I have lived  a life of INGRATITUDE and this day felt awkward, my thanksgiving almost forced.

But God, by his grace, has given me such a gift in showing me his command to give thanks in all things, at all times.  This year I've slowly trudged my way out of the valley of ingratitude and made my way up the mountain of thanksgiving...and the views have been spectacular.  I've seen things in the light of his love and my heart has become tender by what I have seen.  Yes, through giving thanks each day and in as many circumstances as I could, my heart has been softened and humbled as my heart has finally recognized my good Father's lavish, loving care of me.

Yes, thanksgiving has been the rappelling rope that's pulled me out of the valley of ingratitude and connected me to my Father's heart.  As I have scaled this mountain, here's a glimpse of what I have seen:

God's command to give thanks is about living in the light of his loving presence.  Yes we should give thanks for what he does each day to care for us, as we are indebted to him for every.single.thing. we have - from the breath I just took, to the food I eat, to the relationships I enjoy.  But more than doing what we "should" do, God calls us to gratitude because he wants us to SEE CLEARLY his heart as a giver.  He loves to give. He gives lavishly, most fully seen in our salvation.  When I stay in my valley of ingratitude I don't see the gifts for what they are, and more than that, I don't recognize that I have a good, kind, tender Father who loves to lavish his children with good things.

So for me, this year has been about naming gifts, but more than that, it's been about scaling the mountain into the light of his presence, drawing closer to his heart by the rappelling rope of gratitude.

And in the difficult parts of my life, I have chosen to give thanks...because God calls me, yes.  But more than that, these are really some of my most precious gifts.  As God promises in his Word, the difficult parts of life (the suffering, the dying) are what brings new life, being formed into Christ's image (the resurrection) and makes me more ABLE to love enjoy him, the greatest gift....so in suffering I give thanks because those are my most precious gifts, severe though they my feel.  My Father loves me so much that he doesn't stop with the smaller gifts of life and food and friends but goes so far as to SAVE me and then through the suffering kills my old man and makes my new man come alive...alive to his presence, which is in fact the greatest gift.  Yes, enjoying his presence is the greatest gift!

So today, I will eat my turkey and stuffing on top of the mountain of gratitude.  The view from here is spectacular, folks.  God's heart for me and his presence have never been seen so clearly as they are from this crisp, clear view.

God, through his call to thanksgiving in all circumstance,s is calling us all to see him clearly from the top the mountain!!  Isn't the view amazing?

GRATITUDE 232 a storm and the washing away of shame

We'd barely finished breakfast and I already felt emotionally battered.  A conversation about a long-sore subject in my marriage to start the day.  SHAME.  A missed parent-teacher conference and a reminder call from the teacher. SHAME.  Running into a friend who I have hurt deeply yet feel helpless in repairing the wound. Awkward hellos and a deep desire for her to know my heart in the matter.  SHAME.   It was 8:30 and thoughts of failure and shame were doing their best to beat me up. Shame has a way of using the present failures to gut punch, and then it throws a sucker punch in the face with past failures and weaknesses, leaving us bloody and staggering.  And the day was just under way.

I whispered to God that I desperately needed him to meet me....

The rain fell.  I heated up last night's coffee.  I opened his Word and my heart to what he might say. 

Rain storms have become one of my deepest comforts here in Florida, and they are rare in the fall, so I counted it as a great gift for today during this much-needed time with God. Very little about Florida weather is cozy except these giant storms which stop life in its tracks, displaying God's voice in the thunder, his power in the lightning, his faithfulness in the rain.  This gift of an intense storm bringing stillness all around, setting the stage for stillness in my heart - yes, God was bringing comfort to my battered soul.

And these words on shame spoke deeply to me...  

God showed me that for my sins, I have rightful reason to be ashamed. This is appropriate shame. Yet my precious Savior has taken on my shame, becoming my sin so I could become God's righteousness. Oh, sinner saved by grace, Jesus has taken away the shame you should rightly feel for your failures and sins!  As children of God, our shame has been removed and we stand as those who are unashamed, bold, beautiful, holy.  NO SHAME.  

And what about those weaknesses that aren't sin yet cause me to feel shame?  Being unorganized and missing meetings.  Not communicating with a friend the way I wished I would jave...And those tip-of-the-iceberg weakness have a way of reminding me of those deeper weaknesses that won't melt away as long as I live. Yes, my weakness run deep.  What does Jesus say to the shame I feel when those come up?

He calls us to boast in them! YES, BOAST! Yet how can I go from shame to boasting?   

God revealed this morning that my shame is so often self-centered rather than God-centered.  Rather than being rightly ashamed for what dishonors God, I am ashamed of what dishonors me in man's eyes. Rather than looking to honor Christ, I am looking to the world to honor me!  

Repentance needed.  Forgiveness granted.  Moving forward...

Christ's love is a banner over my life that says I am loved, adored, cherished just as I am, and it frees me from needing honor from the world!  In fact, it frees me so much that I can go so far as to boast in my weakness.  My weaknesses and my openness about them bring great glory to God because they show his enough-ness.  Rather than standing on my own strengths or accomplishments (which bring me honor in man's eyes) I can say with Paul, "His grace is sufficient, for his power is made perfect in my weakness...and I will therefore boast all the more gladly in my weaknesses."  Rather than feeling ashamed when I see my weaknesses, I can go the opposite direction, knowing that my God is so pleased with me when I boast about them!  Yes, now that I am firmly planted on the rock of his great love for me, I can boast about what makes me look small, foolish, and weak...because it makes him look big, wise, enough.  And isn't that what I really want?  

The antidote to shame over sin...the cross and what he says about me now.  

The antidote to my shame over weakness...looking to his love, repenting of self-centered shame, moving out in faith to boast in what makes me look weak and shows his great love and power.  

The rain fell all morning.  And God's words washed my shame away.  

Those who look to the Lord are radiant,

their faces shall never be ashamed. 

--Psalm 34:5

GRATITUDE 231 Home. Refreshed. Thankful.

So much to be thankful for now that I am home!

Happy hugs from all my kiddos and husband!
Restored health for our flu-ridden family
Strength to get back into groove of life-oh hello laundry and dishes, I remember you!
Left overs in the fridge from friends
Such a good time away with family and friends.  Such a gift.
T I M E to sit. to write. to drink lots of coffee.  to talk to my Gmaw
Time with
Angie
Sheryl
Kristi
Paula
Pam
Brandi
Chelsea

Gifts.  Thankful for a week away.  Looking forward to a week of naming graces back on the homefront!

GRATITUDE 230 A Veteran's Day Reflection

Like a troop of hungry men, these elderly gentlemen lined up with their trays, waiting patiently for their meal. K and W had joined America's celebration by offering a free meal to any United States veteran. As these elderly men shuffled along, cafeteria women slopped free helpings of chicken and stuffing and turnip greens on their plates, a kind yet meager attempt to thank these men for all they did for our country.   I marveled at all these men, proudly wearing hats that told of their service in wars gone by. Did this cafeteria style line take them back to the days when they lined up for a meal, hungry and tired after their shift fighting in the trenches? Or perhaps they were remembering the meager rations they shared with men who lost their lives alongside them. These men, each with a story to tell, no doubt, deserves a free meal, and so much more for their service of America.

I wish I could sit across from each man and hear his story of war. To eat our plates of chicken and stuffing together and let him me of the losses he saw, the sacrifices he made, the fears he had to conquer. To hear him tell with pride why it was worth it. Why America was worth it. Veteran's day fills my eyes with tears and my heart with gratitude for all these men and the ones fallen did for freedom. For justice. For America.

As my mind lingers in the cafeteria, my heart draws me to another meal, another celebration. The day that we, the eternally free, will celebrate our hero. He is the only veteran in this eternal battle for the freedom of a people he loved, a people held captive by sin and by a terrible enemy. At the party of all parties, he will set the meal before us. And Oh how I long to hear him tell his story. All the sacrifices of all the wars the world has ever known couldn't amount to the loss he took in laying down his own life, in losing his Father's approval, in taking on the wrath that sin deserved, to win this eternal battle. To defeat Satan and death and sin and rescue his people. This Hero deserves a cosmic celebration and that is just what he will have.

You see, the lives of the men in K and W and the ones America lost are telling the greater story of the greatest Hero. And just like those elderly men shuffling along with their free servings of banana pudding would tell us it was worth, so our hero will tell us THE WAR WAS WORTH IT. FREEDOM was worth it. JUSTICE was worth it. HIS KINGDOM and HIS PEOPLE were worth it. On that great Veteran day, no doubt, our hearts will fill gratitude, our eyes with tears, and we will bow before the HERO, saying with voice, WORTHY IS THE LAMB WHO WAS SLAIN!